


i want you so much (but i hate your guts)

by siempreniall



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angry Sex, Barebacking, Blow Job, Bottom Niall, M/M, Orgasm Denial, Top Harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-15
Updated: 2014-02-15
Packaged: 2018-01-12 13:57:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1187802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/siempreniall/pseuds/siempreniall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Niall doesn’t know what he’s still doing there. This isn’t really how he likes to spend his Sunday nights. He doesn’t want to be yelled at and made to feel guilty for something that happened months ago. All he wants is to leave, really.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i want you so much (but i hate your guts)

**Author's Note:**

> title from "landfill" by daughter

There’s a knock on the door and Niall is sure it’s because Louis and Zayn refuse to be quiet during study hours. Their sub-warden, Will, is always on them for everything: yelling, knocking about at three in the morning, screaming down the halls when Man U scores a goal, covering the communal bathroom mirror in silly string (they always clean it up before the cleaners get there). In fact, he’d probably hate Niall and his friends if Liam wasn’t so damn charming with superiors. As the most respectable member of their friend group, Liam is always the one to answer the door when they think Will is the one knocking.

“Sorry, mate, we’ll-” he starts to say as he opens the door, before he notices it’s not Will standing outside.

Niall recognizes the kid. His name’s Harry and he lives at the other end of the hall. He’s tall and pretty with nice hair and stupid green eyes that are darting around the room with suspicion. Lips that look freshly bitten and cheeks reddened from the cold. Niall just wishes he’d leave, honestly.

“I’m just looking for my blue beanie. I put it in the laundry and when I went to get my stuff out of the drier it was gone. I’d like it back,” Harry explains.

“You’re saying that with a very accusatory tone,” Louis says, not taking his eyes off of the game of FIFA he’s currently playing against Niall, “It probably just got lost between the washer and the drier. Happens to the best of us,”

It would be very believable if Zayn wasn’t burying his face into the pillow next to him and heaving with fits of giggles. Liam’s shooting them both unhappy looks.

“That didn’t happen. I specifically remember the beanie on top of my load in the drier. I’m just going around and asking anyone if they have it, is all. It’s important to me. I want it back,”

“Well, you’re wasting your time in here. We don’t need to go rooting around others’ laundry to get clothes to wear. We’re good in that front, thanks,”

Harry raises his arms up to the top of the door frame, drumming his fingers as he does a final look around the room.

“Right then,” he says before he leaves. Niall can hear his bare feet plodding down the hall, back towards his room.

“What right does he have to come in here, just to accuse us of taking his stupid fucking beanie?” Louis asks.

“But you stole it!” Liam points out, heading back to his spot next to Niall.

“Well, yeah, but how does he know it was us?”

“Maybe because you’ve made it your mission to make his life a living hell ever since we moved in three months ago,” Niall suggests.

“Have not! That would require that I put much thought into the things I do. He’s just an easy target, is all,”

Harry _is_ a rather easy target. He never defends himself, and even if he gathers the courage to start something he won’t finish it. Not to mention he doesn’t have any friends in the building, at least Niall doesn’t think so.

“Just give it back to him, Lou,” Liam says with an exasperated sigh.

“He can come and get it,”

“What the hell do you think he just did?”

“Fuck off, Payno. I need some way to relieve stress before exams,”

Niall sighs. “Most people cry or fuck someone or something. Why do you always have to make others miserable to help make yourself feel better?”

“It’s no big deal, really. We’ll return it in a few days. Slip it under his door right before he leaves for holiday,” Zayn says, finally recovering from his laughing fit.

“How’d you even get it, anyways?” Liam asks.

“Loser left his clothes in the drier for like 20 minutes after they were done. I was looking into all the driers to see which ones I could empty so I could finish my goddamn laundry. His beanie was just resting on top, looking all electric blue and lonely. Thought I’d give it a new home – my underwear drawer. He wears that thing every day, I knew he’d be upset,” Louis explains.

“Jesus, Lou” Niall says, getting off of the bed and throwing the controller at Liam, “leave the kid alone. He hasn’t done anything to you,”

Niall walks over to Louis’s dresser and opens up the top drawer. Sure enough, under layers of Calvins lies the missing cap.

“I’m gonna go give it back to him,” he says, walking towards the door. Zayn moves to protest but Niall ignores him and leaves the room.

He knows where Harry lives because he’s been there a few times. It’s down at the other end of the hall, on the corner. He’s got a single and Niall hates him for it. He loves living with Liam, really does. Liam is quiet, tidy, and always ready for dinner whenever Niall decides he’s hungry. He could have done much worse (like a stranger or, God forbid, Louis), but sometimes their cramped room is just too small for two people.

Niall knocks on the door, right under the sign that Will made that reads “Harold”, even though he’s pretty sure the kid’s name is Harry. Just Harry.

“Hey?” Harry asks, as if that’s some sort of question.

“Here, found this,” Niall says, holding out the beanie.

Harry purses his lips and stares down at it before grabbing it.

“Interesting development,” he adds, retreating back into his room but not closing the door.

Niall gets confused because he’s not quite sure what to do. Harry didn’t invite him in, but didn’t tell him to leave either so he hesitates on what to do. He does know, though, that he’s tired of studying for calculus and he’s tired of listening to Louis’s antics as they play FIFA for the third time that day. If Harry’s the only change of scenery he’s gonna get, well at least he looks pretty.

He steps into the room and adjusts himself to the darkness. The only lights on are some fairy lights bordering the ceiling and a desk lamp by Harry’s laptop.

“You can shut the door, if you want,” Harry says, putting the beanie back into his closet.

Niall does just that, and suddenly he feels weird. Everything looks and feels familiar. The air smells like fresh linens and the music coming from the laptop is slow and sad with a moaning female vocalist and a steady drum beat. Even the bed sheets, which he runs his hands over as he sits down on the bed, feel familiar - unchanged from the last time he was in here.

“So where’d you find it?” Harry asks, returning to his computer to try and quiet the music.

“Oh, uh, went to use the bathroom and saw it lying on the ground. Maybe you dropped it?” Niall lies.

“Funny, didn’t think your friend’s closet was in the bathroom,”

“No, it’s not. But his underwear drawer is,” Niall jokes, trying to lighten the mood. Harry doesn’t laugh.

“Is that what you lot do, then? Sit around in that messy room of theirs and plot ways to make my life miserable,”

“Listen, it’s not like that…” Niall starts.

“Oh really? Maybe you just sit in there and talk about what we did at the beginning of the year? Giggling like school children anytime someone says penis?”

“Call me an asshole all you want, but I’d never kiss and tell!”

“Oh, darling, we did much more than kiss,”

Harry turns to look away from Niall and stare out the window. It’s snowing a bit and the wind is blowing like crazy, making it seem like a wild snow globe outside. Harry looks hypnotized but Niall is too preoccupied with the electricity of the room. It feels heated, he feels like something is ready to explode and Harry’s just sitting on it. Niall wants to leave, wants to start talking again, wants to do something, but he’s motionless and silent. Someone knocks at the door and Harry’s up and out of his seat before Niall even registers the noise.

“What do you want?” Harry sneers.

“Niall in there?” the visitor asks. Niall recognizes the voice as Louis’s.

“He stopped by a minute ago, gave me back that beanie that you totally didn’t nick out of my drier, mumbled something about food, and left. I’m not his babysitter, I didn’t keep after him,”

Niall realizes that, with the way the door opens, he’s totally blocked from Louis’s view.

“Fine, whatever. Enjoy being alone,” Louis says before stomping off down the hall. Harry slams the door shut, as hard as the slow-closing hinges will allow.

Niall expects him to return to his seat by the window, but instead he continues to stand by the door. It’s torture, really, being this close to Harry again. Harry with his bright green eyes and puffy lips and soft hands and taunting muscles. It’s all so close but Niall gets the distinct impression that Harry’s not here to be touched.

“Why are you so attached to that hat, anyways?” Niall asks.

“It’s not that! I don’t like feeling played with. Don’t like people touching my shit, toying with my emotions,” Harry spits out. Niall could feel the venom from the words lashing against his skin. He looks up at Harry with a blank look on his face, looking for the words to say.

“I wish you didn’t look so adorable when you’re confused. Makes it hard to stay pissed off,” Harry continues.

“I don’t know what to say. Are you talking about what happened in the beginning of term?” Niall asks.

“Oh, look who’s catching on now,”

“I… it was nothing-” Niall starts.

“But that’s the problem, isn’t it?” Harry is yelling now, “What’s ‘nothing’ to someone isn’t always ‘nothing’ to everyone!”

“We just fucked around a few times! It was no big deal!” Niall screams back.

They had met at someone’s house party the first weekend of term, a mutual friend of theirs or something. Even though they lived on the same floor they had yet to actually cross paths, but they hit it off immediately. They had gotten maybe a little too drunk off of some cheap beer, but all it did was make them laugh more. Niall had lost Louis somewhere during the beginning of the night and Liam and Zayn hadn’t even come, so it was just the two of them at the first real party of their college careers. Then Harry’s hand was down Niall’s pants and the other was around his neck, staking his claim, and it was all history from there.

“You don’t shag someone for three weeks straight and then ignore them!” Harry continues.

“You didn’t think that I was looking for a relationship, right? It was just fun,”

“No! I’m not some clinger or something! But who the fuck wouldn’t be pissed when someone who they had trusted just refuses to acknowledge their existence? If you had wanted to break things off, fine. It’s not like I was incapable of finding another piece of ass,”

“Then what’s the problem!”

“You just stopped responding to my texts! You looked the other way when we were in the bathroom at the same time! You stopped using the stairs by my door so that you wouldn’t have to face me!” Harry says as he starts to pace around the (small) room.

“That’s not true!” Niall yells, even though, okay, it kinda is.

“And then, oh just the icing on the cake, your little friends started messing with me. Ramming into me in the hall, knocking on my door at all hours of the night, stealing my shit. You’re telling me that was just a coincidence? It wasn’t because you’ve been sitting in there telling them about those nights in here?”

“They know… nothing about that. They think we’re practically strangers,” Niall says.

Harry is standing right in front of him then, chin to his chest and hand in his hair as he ponders what’s happening.

“You’re gutless, that’s all,” he finally says back.

Niall doesn’t know what he’s still doing there. This isn’t really how he likes to spend his Sunday nights. He doesn’t want to be yelled at and made to feel guilty for something that happened months ago. All he wants is to leave, really. Harry’s room is growing warm and he continually tugs at his collar, trying to get cool again. He feels uncomfortable and awkward, shifting on the bed, and he feels small under Harry’s gaze. Harry’s already got a few inches on him, but because he’s sitting Niall feels like a child being scolded. Not sure what he’s waiting for, it’s not like Harry needs to dismiss him, he gets up to leave. Tries to say a quick goodbye and maneuver himself around Harry, but he never quite reaches the door.

Harry is on him quick, and Niall’s not sure what’s happening but soon he feels the familiar brush of soft lips against his and he just melts into Harry’s touch. His face is cupped in Harry’s hands and he can feel thumbs rubbing against his jaw. An easy, comforting touch that reminds him of lazy Sundays in Harry’s bed. It doesn’t take long before Niall’s kissing back, getting lost in the ease of this all, and how he’s missed it. He’s walked back towards the door, hitting wood with a thump, and a hand sneaks under his shirt and it eventually finds its way to one of his nipples, rubbing over it torturously. He gasps at the sensations racing up his spine, only prompting Harry to kiss him harder.

Niall doesn’t really understand anything that’s going on, why Harry is acting like this or why he wants it to happen in the first place. He thought he had left this little crush behind weeks before, but it’s ignited in him more than ever. Deciding quickly that he doesn’t want to leave it here, doesn’t want to leave it at just him pressed against a wall being kissed within an inch of his life,  he lets his hand trail down Harry’s body, finally stopping once it reaches Harry’s fly. He’s just about to get it undone when Harry pulls away.

“You think you can just get to that so easy?” Harry asks, cocking his head.

“I um-” Niall starts. He has to compose himself when Harry starts scratching the side of his head, “I want-”

Harry leans in closer, “What do you want?”

“I want you,”

He does want him. Wants him more than anything he can remember. Wants the heavy weight of his cock against his tongue and his fingers buried deep within. Needs to get off, needs to finally stop being so hard. He just really wants, more than anything, for Harry to pay him attention again.

“Look at this pretty, little mouth,” Harry drags a thumb across his bottom lip, “I bet it’d look even prettier stretched around my cock. What do you think? Want me to fuck your mouth?”

As the seconds tick by Niall finds it harder to think, mind clouded by Harry’s hand on his hip and how he’s growing hard just from the words flowing out of his mouth. Niall stands there, fidgeting in his spot under Harry’s glare. He nods, knowing he’d do anything that gets him closer to an orgasm now.

“Is that what you want, Pretty Boy? Bet you’d look gorgeous down on the floor, taking me further and further. Is that what you want? You’re gonna have to use your words, tell me,”

Niall gulps, “I want you to fuck my mouth,”

Harry takes a step back and runs a hand through his hair. He thinks it over, then finally decides how he wants everything done.

“Get your kit off,”  

Niall does as he’s told without even putting thought to it, pulling his shirt over his head so Harry’s eyes can rake over his body. When that’s done, Harry casts an annoyed look at his jeans, so he pulls those down with his pants. He wants to cover himself up with his hands as he stands naked in front of a fully-clothed Harry, but it’s not something he hasn’t shown off before.

“Down on your knees,” Harry commands again, grinning as Niall complies. Without another word he undoes the rest of his fly and gets his cock out, stroking it a few times as he stares at Niall on the floor. He’s being good, not wanting to risk whatever wrath Harry may be hiding, so he keeps his hands folded in his lap and keeps his eyes trained on Harry’s furrowed brow.

Finally, Harry breaks and moves forward, cradling the side of Niall’s face in his hand and keeping his dick steady with the other. Niall doesn’t even need to be told to open up, spreading his lips as soon as Harry is close enough. The hand on his face drops away as soon as the cock enters his mouth and he leans forward to get it to go deeper. He knows Harry likes that, getting as deep as possible. He doesn’t have the best gag reflex in the world, but he still always tries his best.

Niall leans back, taking a breath as Harry again guides himself in. He tries bobbing back and forth, but without using his hands it’s hard. Usually he likes to lick long stripes up and down Harry’s cock and get it really sloppy and wet to make up for how bad he is at deepthroating, but it’s impossible now. Harry seems to get impatient so he takes Niall’s hair in hand again, pulling on it sharply in a way that Niall doesn’t altogether dislike. He shoves himself in further, making Niall sputter around the length of his cock, holding himself against the back of Niall’s throat. Niall only ends up trying to get air with eyes forced wide open at the intrusion.

“Relax, babe, we can go even deeper if you relax,”

The words help Niall as the first caring thing Harry has said. He tries to swallow, getting used to the fullness in his throat. Harry pulls back and then shoves in again, rocking his hips so that he nudges further in with each push. He slowly goes deeper until Niall feels his nose brush against the hairs at Harry’s navel, and he can barely even believe that they’ve gotten this far. He finally opens his eyes in the first time, for what seems like ages, to look up at Harry’s face. Through teary eyes he can see Harry’s head thrown back, eyes screwed shut, mouth open in ecstasy.

Harry pulls back a bit, and then pushes in quickly. Niall closes his eyes again as Harry properly fucks his mouth, concentrating on keeping his teeth held back and his throat loose. It can be a little overwhelming sometimes, but that’s what keeps him going. He likes the build of it all in his chest, the tension leaving his throat, and how he can feel the scratch that’s going to be left in his voice later. He can pass it off as a cold quite easily, but there’ll always be the memory of Harry pressed deep into him to remind him of the truth. Sometimes it can be too much and if that happens he knows he can pinch at Harry’s calves, he’s had to use it once or twice when they first had started whatever they were doing, but he likes that he’s gotten better. Deep down, he hopes that Harry notices too, and that maybe he’ll even be rewarded.

Finally, Harry pulls out. Niall surges forward, trying to catch his breath and gasping for the air that’s been denied to him.

“Stay there,” Harry says as he walks back through the room.

He throws off clothes along the way and goes looking for something that Niall can’t figure out. Finally, he finds what he’s looking for and comes back to stand in front of Niall again. In his hand, he can see the bottle of lube. Harry holds out his hand and helps him off the ground. Before Niall can surge forward to get the kiss he wants, the one he thinks he deserves, Harry’s spinning him around and pressing his chest to the door.

Harry leans forward and Niall can feel his hot breath against his cheek. He tries to turn towards it but Harry just pushes him harder, and then there’s the sound of the bottle being opened.

“Your mouth so sweet you almost made me cum inside it,” Harry murmurs, voice low and slow, “But I didn’t want to do that, did I? I have other plans for you,”

“You gonna fuck me?” Niall asks. It’s a stupid question, he knows it, but he also knows Harry wants him to play along.

“Fuck you good and right. Make you feel me for days. Is that what you want, Niall? Want to stumble out of my room with a hitch in your step to match the scratch in your throat? Get people wondering, asking questions about who fucked you so well?”

He nods before remembering he needs to talk, “Give it to me, please,”

Harry doesn’t say anything else, just kicks Niall’s legs apart and presses a slick finger to his hole. Niall takes a deep breath before Harry’s finally pushing in. It’s always kinda weird to begin with but he’ll end up a writhing mess in a matter of minutes and that’s what keeps him going. The finger keeps on moving in at an almost maddeningly slow pace, but he knows that if it goes any faster he’ll end up in pain. And Harry’s always so good with him, keeps him so safe. Finally, he can feel the final knuckle up against his rim and he knows that it’s all the way in. He lets out the air he’s been holding in as Harry presses up against his back and feels his lips up against his ear.

“You’re so tight, God. Feel so good, can’t wait to get inside you,”

He slides his finger back slowly until it’s almost out, but then pushes it in again quicker. Repeating it again and again.

“Would never think you’d be this tight after all the times I fucked you. Fucked you against the wall and ‘till the mattress groaned. Never heard anyone scream my name so desperately,”

Niall can’t help it when he moans and he tries to suppress it, doesn’t want to alert anyone around to what’s happening in the room.

“Don’t do that,” Harry scolds, “Don’t hold those sounds in. I want to hear them, want to hear how I break you apart,”

Another finger comes to press against his rim, and this time he doesn’t suppress the whine that rips out of him as it’s pushed in.

“That’s it,” Harry says, moving his fingers apart to stretch Niall further.

Niall bucks around, trying to grind down on Harry’s fingers and get them to go deeper. He’s so close, so fucking close, to getting what he wants when Harry presses him harder into the door.

“Being a bit greedy today, are we?” he asks, “Like you’re properly gagging for it,”

Niall tries to respond, but all he can think about is his achingly hard cock trapped between his belly and the door and the burn from the two fingers opening him up. Harry’s just about to push another finger in when he brushes against the spot he’s been looking for, making Niall’s knees buckle and knock against the door.

“Again, please,” Niall asks lowly.

“You think you deserve it? Think you’ve been good enough for me to give you what you want?”

“Please, I’ve been good,”

Harry’s fingers start to move out of him, and he expects them to return with a third one next to them. Instead, they leave him entirely and he can feel Harry wipe his fingers along his back.

“I think you’re all stretched, enough for me to fuck into,”

Niall wants the fingers back. He misses the fullness and he wants Harry to push against his prostate more, to reward him dammit, but he lets Harry guide him to the bed instead. He falls onto his hands and knees on the mattress, Harry kneeling behind him with hands at his hips, letting his head fall down between his shoulders, long since given up on looking as if he’s not desperate for a good fuck. He is, and he’s shaking with it.

“Gonna go in easy,” Harry says quietly, like Niall’s barely supposed to hear it, “Don’t want to hurt you. Never want to hurt you,”

Niall sucks in a shaky breath before he can feel Harry’s cock teasing against his hole, being pushed in without too much of a warning. It’s a lot, and he almost fears that it’s too much. The burn radiates through him and for the first time he thinks he might want to tell Harry stop, but he can’t, he needs this more than he can even say.

Harry goes slow, inching in. His hands reach forward and smooth over the pale expanse of Niall’s back, gliding over the knobs of his spine and wracking a shiver through his body. As soon as he’s all the way in, Niall can’t help but let out a whine.

“Can’t wait to wreck you,” Harry says as he starts pulling out slowly, “Been torture going this slow. Just want to double you over and fuck into you properly. Give it all to you. Make you wonder why you ever left. Does anyone else fuck you like me?”

Niall gasps for air as he shakes his head and hopes it’s enough of an answer.

A few more thrusts and Harry starts to go faster. “Fuck you right open. Fuck you so good,” Niall winces at the pain, but soon Harry can’t help but hit his prostate. His moans turns into broken chant of Harry’s name, over and over again, voice sounding more desperate with each repetition. He drops down onto his forearms when he feels his muscles giving out, and he’s about to fall from those, too, when Harry’s arms are suddenly around his waist and pulling him up – back to front.

One arm comes around to hold onto his chest, to give him leverage, while the other snakes down to knead at the soft round of his ass. Niall’s head falls back to his shoulder and Harry mouths at his neck. He tries to turn his head to find Harry’s mouth but he refuses to return it. Instead, Niall feels hands grabbing onto his arms as he’s lowered back to the bed. Harry falls over his back and his thrusts grow erratic.

All he says is, “Gon’ fill you up,” before he’s coming.

Niall moves his forehead across the pillow under his head to rid it of the sweat covering his face. Harry is still panting across his back, not yet moving. It feels uncomfortable as he starts to go soft. Finally, he pulls out and rolls off of Niall. He doesn’t want to talk, doesn’t want to disturb Harry as he comes down from his orgasm, but there are only a few thoughts that haven’t been fucked out of his mind yet, and they all involve how desperately hard he is.

“Harry,” he says quietly, “I haven’t come yet. Can I… can I…”

He comes back to at that moment, turning to face Niall next to him on the bed. He opens his mouth, and Niall’s sure he’s going to be given permission. Instead, he pushes Niall onto his back and climbs over him, the peaceful daze in his eyes changing.

“Do you think you deserve it?” Harry asks.

“I was good!” Niall whispers frantically, “I took you all the way into my mouth and didn’t touch myself. I followed all of your rules, I was good!”

Harry crouches lower so that he can talk directly in his ear, “Ahh, but it isn’t about what you did tonight, is it? It’s all about how you’ve made me feel all the months since you left my room with a kiss on the cheek and never came back. Humiliated, confused, frustrated…”

“I was wrong! I should have never-”

He’s silenced by Harry’s hand coming up to grab at his face, bringing them nose to nose.

“Maybe I should make you feel like I did. Send you back to your room without letting you come. Do you think Liam will help you? Or will you have to slink off to the showers and do it yourself?”

“No, please,” he shakes his head, “Liam would never. It’s always been you, just you,”

“Or maybe,” Harry snakes a hand down to rub over a nipple, making Niall groan, “I’ll have you get me hard again and I’ll fuck you until you come, just on my cock. Have you ride me,”

Niall shakes his head as much as he can in Harry’s grip – he’s never done that before.

The hand circling around his nipple slips down further to give him a soft stroke. The feather-light touch, quickly lost, sends tears streaking out of Niall’s eyes.

“Maybe I’ll keep you in here all night. Make you go to bed without getting to come and I’ll fuck you in the morning, see if that helps at all. How about that? Sounds pretty good to me, how about you. Is that what you want?”

“Please, I…,” Niall begs again, a tear slipping down his cheek. He tries to get across, if only with his eyes, that he _needs_ this, “ _Harry-,_ ”

Harry sees the desperation in the other boy’s face and moves his hand from the base of Niall’s cock to stroke it firmly. A sob wracks through Niall’s body as he finally get some pressure to relieve himself from being so achingly hard. Harry leans down, pressing closer into Niall’s space, and his voice turns soft “You’re alright, Ni. I’ve got you. You’re okay, go ahead and come,”

Niall nods as he comes, letting out a harsh sob as his orgasm is ripped out of him. Harry’s hand moves to smooth over his hair and he presses small kisses to his cheek. It takes a few minutes for him to calm down, his mind endlessly swimming.

“How was it?” Harry asks as he moves to lie beside Niall, rubbing his shoulder comfortingly.

It takes him a few moments to gather his thoughts and respond. “It was a lot, but good. Really, really good. Amazing,”

“Good,” Harry smiles, his stern demeanor completely gone, “You’re not aching are you? You alright?”

Niall shifts, feeling the dull pain radiating between his legs. He likes it, though. Always has.

“Ehm, hurts a bit but nothing a big boy like me can’t handle,”

“I can kiss it, make it better?”

“Gross,” Niall laughs, pulling Harry down to get him to kiss him. Always wants to kiss him. Harry’s the first to pull back again.

“I thought it was going to be too much. I never really asked about… not letting you come. I kept on waiting for the safe word, but you have no idea how happy I was that it never came,”

“Let’s just say before you I never knew how badly I would want to _not_ come. Maybe we can try that again sometime? As much as it was driving me insane, God I’ve never come so hard in my life,”

 “You were so hot, you know? Your mouth… Christ, your mouth. Have you ever taken so much of me in before?”

Niall shakes his head, but he’s happy to be getting the recognition for it. “You know, I was doubting this whole thing, but it was honestly really, _really_ hot,”

“Christ, I know,” Harry groans, rolling his eyes back and letting a large smile take over his face, “I’ve been hard all day just thinking about this. Almost had to wank in the shower to relieve it a bit, but I waited for you. Knew you’d be worth it, and _fuck_ you were worth it,”

“Aww, that’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me,”

“You deserve it,” Harry says, rolling over to blanket his body over Niall’s interrupting whatever next he was gonna say to kiss him instead. It’s easy to get distracted by Harry, by his unruly hair and how easy it is to pull and his lean body, how your fingers can roam over it for what seems like hours. Niall pulls away before he can get too lost.

“You’re so smart. Who else would’ve seen some assholes stealing his hat as an opportunity to try out some hidden kink?”

“Yeah, it was great, whatever. Maybe try and get them to settle down, though? They should’ve out-grown those stupid pranks in year seven,”

Niall giggles, “Sure, they’re kinda pricks. But they’re almost family to me now. I’ll try and get them to grow up a bit though, okay? You can keep your beanies safe and sound,”

They lie there for a few more seconds, their breaths and heart rates evening out together. Harry’s playlist has stopped and the sounds of the floor have died down a bit, Niall idly wonders if anyone heard them. Their hall has surprisingly good sound insulation, but it’s not a miracle-worker.

Harry lolls his head to the side and blows a puff of air into Niall’s face, using his shock to reach over and attack his side. Niall’s bad at tickling; bad at being ticklish nearly everywhere on his body and bad at defending himself. Harry likes to straddle Niall for better access, digging into his ribs and grabbing his arm to thrust above his head so he can at Niall’s underarm. And it always ends with Harry scrabbling into Niall’s neck until he tilts his head, the perfect opportunity for him to fit their mouths together. To chase back the gasping breaths that he’s already won out of him.

And Niall doesn’t quite mind it either. The tickling and the fucking or whatever. It’s all… it’s all just them. Figuring out its each other’s limits just works. He wouldn’t trade it for the world. They end up snuggled together under the duvet. Harry’s head resting on Niall’s shoulder and his fingers tapping out secret songs into his skin until it’s later than they usually stay together. But they’ve been pushing it further and further lately.

“I need to go,” Niall whispers

“No you don’t,” Harry whispers back.

“They’re all probably worrying about where I’ve run off to,”

“I didn’t know ‘worry’ was part of the emotional range,”

“Shove it,” Niall laughs, “They care about me,”

Harry’s face grows serious, “Enough to tell them about us?”

There’s a tense silence until Harry breaks it with a smile, Niall following after with an awkward laugh.

“There are some things they’re just better off not knowing. At least not yet,”

“That’s okay,” Harry says, pressing feather-light kisses into the taut muscle of his shoulder, “Doesn’t mean you have to leave, though. Stay a while longer, say you were over a friend’s studying or something,”

“Haz,” he draws out, tilting his head no matter how hard he’s trying to get away, “I need to get to bed,”

“What amazing luck!” Harry says excitedly, reaching over to flick off the bedside lamp, “I have a nice, big bed here,”

Niall doesn’t dignify that with a response, just shoves Harry off of him with a thump and gets off the bed. Harry whines in pain and reaches out to grab at Niall’s hand, but he manages to slip away. He ends up giggling in the end and turning the light back on so Niall can find his clothes scattered on the floor. Harry stays on the bed with his knees tucked up as Niall gets everything back on and his hair in order. You could barely tell anything he had ever happened, the hitch in his step excused.

He stops by the edge of Harry’s bed to give him a goodnight kiss before he leaves, ignoring the hands reaching under his shirt, trying to get it off.

“I’ll text you in the morning, yeah?”

Harry replies with a wave of his hand, shutting off the light and diving under the covers. Niall checks that the coast is clear before dashing off into the hall.

When he makes it back to his and Liam’s room the lights are still on and all the boys seem to be in there.

“Where have you been, Ni?” Louis asks as he barges in. They’re all bent over Liam’s bed, a large sheet of paper down between them.

“Went to this girl’s room downstairs. We’re in the same maths class and she wanted help with studying for our exam,”

“Was she hot?” Zayn asks.

Niall raises his eyebrows, “Yeah, you could say that.” They all miss the sly smirk spread across his face, “What are you all doing anyways?”

“Planning something else to do to that Harry Asshole kid. You just gonna stand there or you gonna come over and help?”

Niall remembers Harry’s words and raises his hand to tell him to stop. But then he thinks better of it, thinks that maybe this time Harry will tie him up. If whatever they do is bad enough.

“Yeah, what do I need to do?”


End file.
